A Meaning For Life
by OhGodNoNoMoreCandles
Summary: Sakura is ashamed of her life after she becomes pregnant with Sasuke's baby. Her life is a mess and she's going to make it right...but how?
1. Chapter 1

"Why?" Sakura asked as she looked at the pregnancy test in her hands._'How can this happen?'_Sakura questioned in her mind and fell to the floor crying.

This little stick came out positive for the last 3 weeks but still Sakura couldn't beileve it.

"W-why now?"She said between sobs. _'I-I can't tell them and definiley not him...what am I going to do?-'_Sakura's thoughts were stopped by a knock on her front door.

"Sakura you there?" A quiet voice asked through the door."Hold on a moment" Sakura tried to stay strong as she wiped away the tears and walked to the door.

"Hi Hinata" Sakura said,opening the door as she tried to fake smile. "Um...what are you doing here?" Sakura asked in the nicest of ways.

"Me, you and Ino are going shopping for dresses for the ball next week " Hinata said reminding her friend.

_'Sh*t!' _Sakura yelled in her mind as she just remembered she promised Ino and Hinata that she would go shopping with them today.

"So are you ready?" Hinata asked in a sweet and quiet voice.

"Um...I forgot..." Sakura said.

"Oh well I-" Hinata paused as she felt a hand on her shoulder.

"Come on Sakura" Ino said as she laid her hand on Hinata's shoulder.

"Oh Ino!" Sakura said with surprise to see her long time friend standing in the doorway.

Ino looked surprised to see the look on Sakura's face. "Um..Hinata can you give us a minute?" Ino said her quiet friend.

"Sure Ino" Hinata said respectfully and walked out the door without a word.

"Sakura is there something wrong?" Ino asked as she stared at her friend.

"Oh...its nothing" Sakura said._ 'Oh man'_

"Sakura I know when something is wrong" Ino said as she read the expression on Sakura's face.

"Really Ino its nothing"

_'I'm going to find out' _Ino said in her mind. "Then come on" Ino said as she grabbed Sakura's hand and pulled her out of the apartment.

A sigh excaped Sakura's lips as her friend walked her to the new mall that had tons of stores.

* * *

"Come on Sakura try in on!" Ino said as she handed Sakura a rainbow colored dress and Sakura huffed.

"Ino I'm 19 years old I can pick out my own clothes!" Sakura snapped.

"Well sorry" Ino said with a bit of shock._ 'She's not like herself'_

"Um let's not fight girls today is shopping day" Hinata said as she stood between the girls with a arm full of her and Ino's chothing.

Sakura sighed and closed her eyes from the words Hinatasaid. "I'm sorry" She said quietly._ 'Stupid mood swings'_

"It's fine" Ino said and handed Sakura the dress with a smile.

Sakura groaned and grabbed the dress then headed to the dressing room.

After a good 3 minutes of getting into the rainbow dress Sakura came out the dressing room with a embarrassed look on her face. "It looks great!" Ino exclaimed.

"I look like a unicorn threw up on me" Sakura said.

"Um I like I" Hinata said to try and make Sakura feel good about it.

"Yeah I-" Ino couldn't help but giggle.

"Fugly dress"Sakura said before she stomped off to the dressing room in embarrassment and anger.

Ino waited til Sakura was gone into the dressing room to walk over to Hinata.

"Hey Hinata" Ino whispered to the black haired girl. "Did you notice anything different about Sakura?" She asked.

"Um no Ino what do you mean?" Hinata ask as she was unaware of what Ino was talking about.

"I mean the fact she's hiding something from us!" Ino very quietly yelled. _'I just know it!"_

"That seems very unlikely" Hinata said with a smile on her face._ 'She would never hid anything from us...'_Hinata thought as she look at Ino's very angry face.

Ino let out a mad sigh from how little Hinata knew.

Sakura came back with a white dress in her hands. "I'm ready to go" Sakura said and walked to the register.

* * *

Hinata and Ino nodded and followed their friend after they paid forthe clothing After a hour or two Sakura,Ino and Hinata went to the food court.

Sakura stared at a young couple from across the food court as Ino and Hinata talked.

_'I wish I had love like that' _Sakura watched them with a sad smile. _'Like that'll happen'_

"Hey Sakura" Ino said as she looked at her friend. "Are you going to eat or what?" Ino asked.

Sakura put on a fake smiled and looked at her pizza sitting in front of her. _'Eww'_Sakura complained in her mind.

"Is there something wrong?" Hinata asked with a worried face.

"Of course not" Sakura said and took a bit out of the piece of pizza._ 'My stomach...'_

Ino smiled and took a bit of her pizza and Hinata did the same. After both girls swallowed they noticed that Sakura began to sweat.

"Are you ok?" Ino asked.

Sakura only responded by clenching her stomach and running to the bathroom.

Ino and Hinata stared at each other with shock.

"I'm going to-" Ino said as she started to get up to follow Sakura but Hinata grabbed her by the wrist.

"It's better to leave her alone" Hinata said in a quiet tone.

Ino let out a sigh before she sat back down.

* * *

~_Sakura's P.O.V~_

I left a shocked Ino and Hinata to run to the bathroom and straight to a the nearest toilet.

_"Why now?"_I qestioned to myself and threw up in the toilet.

It remind me of one of those movie with the drunk girls throwing up in the tiolet and the boy coming in to comfort her by holding her hair out of her face...but it wasn't the same for me...not at all...

After I was done I went to wash my hand and wipe my face...one thing stopped me...as I looked in the mirror.

"Who is that girl?" I qestioned.

I let out a small chuckle. I really need to stop watching corny movies.

I walked out the bathroom when I was finished. As soon as I walked out I bumped into a figure.

"Will you watch were you're going?" I heard the person snap.

"I'm sorry I-" I stopped and saw the person I bumped into was the person that started it all...Sasuke Uchiha...the reason way I'm pregnant.

Tears started to build up in my eyes as I looked at him.

He started to get up and put his hand out to help me up. "Are you ok?" He asked in a annoyed tone.

It was clear he didn't remember the night since we were both drunk.

A tear slid down my cheek as I thought about it...I pushed him aside as I ran to the exit with tears in my eyes.

"Sakura!" I heard Ino and Hinata yell before I ran out the mall.

I took one look back at 'him'. Which was a bad idea because I started to sob as I saw his face.

~~.~~

Once I was finally home I slammed the door. All I wanted was to be with myself. It was clear...

"Why?" I yelled and started to throw my couch pillows around. "You were suppost to be the one" I whispered as ran into my room with tears flowing.

I layed in my bed...it was just as cold as I remembered...

I hugged my legs and continued to cry...I just felt so broken up in side...alone with no one but myself...some how its how I've been feeling lately.

Lately seemed like forever...like I was falling...losing myself...and the person who is to blame is...Sasuke.

Just thinking of him tore me up inside...but there was nothing I could do about it...just cry.

As I thought to myself I started to fall asleep just wishing that it would just go away. Soon enough I fell asleep with tear stains on my pillow and fresh tears in my eyes.

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**So how was chapter 1? :3 Like it? Hate it?**

**Review! It means the world to me! :D**

**-STA**


	2. Chapter 2

I woke up to find myself curled up into a ball on my bed. From the coldness in the air I held my arms close together.

_'I should tell Tsunade'_ I said in my mind hoping it would be as easy as it sound. I had to tell her she would understand...that I can't go on any missions.

I let out a sigh to the thought and hopped out the bed, hoping for a better day at the most.

I went to the bathroom to take a shower. Feeling the warm water hit my skin softly made me a bit more relaxed then what I felt lately. Thinking of all the things wrong with my life just made my head spin. Let's go down the list. I'm pregnant with the baby of man I WAS totally in love with. I don't want a baby. And neither does Sasuke. Which was my problem. I put my hand on my very little baby bump for a moment.

To think I have another human being inside of me just felt inhuman. To hold a living thing in you...some people call it a miracle. To give life to another being. A being that will walk, talk and breath. A being that would be my child. The thoughts hurt my head. Life was getting slower when I felt alone. Sure I had my friends and family...but I just want someone to to support me. To be there through it all with me. Just the thought that someone would stand by me. Sure I could just get rid of the baby but...getting rid of it was just like killing a person. A person that want to see the world no matter if it could be cruel. To have life.

I let out a sigh as I turned off the shower and grabbed my towel.

* * *

After I dried my self off I put on a sweat shirt with a pair of blue jeans. I was just heading out for a while nothing worth dressing up for. I tied my hair back in a loose pony tail to keep it from covering my face and my regular shoes. _'Well here it goes' _I thought as I put my hand on my door knob.

I opened the door slowly to be greeted by the crisp cool wind of the season of Fall. I walk out of my apartment and locked the door behind me. The wind blew harder as I walked down the steps of the apartment complex. I stumbled as walked down the last to steps...but the wind was the least of my concern...the way Tsunade was going to take the news was on my mine. Tsunade was like a second mother to me. Mom...I wish she was here right now. She always knew how to cheer me up. She and I would have talks that seemed forever...I miss her...she would understand my situation. She was in the same mess as me once...but it seemed easier for her. I just wanted to cry my heart out,she would hug me and tell me everything would be ok. But things are different know. She's gone with the angels and I'm alone. I slid my hands into my pockets for warmth as I walked down the street. I continued to walk down the street til I saw two familiar faces walking down the same path as me and I knew them both two well...Naruto and Sasuke. I suddenly panicked and pulled the hoodie of my sweat shirt over my head.

"Damn" I whispered.

I saw them come closer...which was a bad thing! I looked around for a way to escape walking the same path as them. It was clear that they didn't see me yet and that's the way I want it. Because just looking at Sasuke's face made me burst into tears.I just want to escape it all. I looked around for away to get away. I noticed a little alley way in the corner of my eye. There was my chance and I took it. I ran down the dark little alley. For a second I looked back to see Naruto and Sasuke chasing me. 'Think fast!' I yelled in my head. I started make hand sighs.

* * *

_~Sasuke's POV~_

Me and Naruto continued to chase Sakura.

I wanted to know what the hell was her problem! She running off yesterday crying and leaving me with a very angry Ino. I mean what the hell? It makes me think I did something wrong! I watched as she did some hand sighs. I stopped for a moment and put my hand in front of Naruto to stop him.

Naruto let out a growl. "What?" He asked.

"Loser I can't believe you fell for it" I said. "What are you talking about?" Naruto asked once again.

I threw my kunai at Sakura. And i hit her in the back.

"What the hell was that?" Naruto yelled at me.

"A subtitute jutsu" I state. The Sakura I threw my kunai at turned into a log.

"Hey Sasuke..." Naruto said. "Do you think Sakura-Chan is trying to avoid us?"

"Hn"

* * *

_~Sakura's POV~_

_Hokage Tower was in my sight. I walked there with a faster pace the last time. I REALLY didn't want to see anymore familiar faces. I continued my way to Hokage Tower til I stopped at the door. __'Should I really do this?'_ I questioned myself. I really didn't want anybody to find out about this. _'Yes!'_ I took on more deep breath before I walked in.

My heart was pounding harder and harder the closer I got to Tsunade's office. I watched as my hand started to shake,My legs started to shake as well, my palms were starting to sweat on the way. Tsunade's office was right in front of me...I took what I thought was my last breath...and knocked softly.

"Come in" I heard Tsunade muttered.

I slowly walked in. "Tsunade-Sama" I said as I bowed.

"Sakura!" Tsunade said as her face lite up to see her student. "How is my student?"

"Um I've been better" I felt a wave of fear it me. "I-I um..."

"Yes?" Tsunade waited for me to spit it out but I couldn't.

I really wanted to tell her just thinking of the possible things she could say made me feel frighten. I took a deep breath which seemed like something I did alot today from the frustration. I held the little bump and started to think about what I was going to say.

"I g-got something to tell you"

Tsunade looked me in the eyes as I started to speak.

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**Thank you all who reviewed the last chapter! The reviews mean so much to me! I'll try and have the next chapter up soon. Review! *wink wink!***

**-SkyTwilightAngel**


	3. Chapter 3

**Thank you all who reviewed and faved. It makes me feel good. :D**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto**

Enjoy!

* * *

_~Re-cap~_

_I really wanted to tell her just thinking of the possible things she could say made me feel frighten. I took a deep breath which seemed like something I did alot today from the frustration. I held the little bump and started to think about what I was going to say._

_"I g-got something to tell you"_

_Tsunade looked me in the eyes as I started to speak._

* * *

_~Sakura's POV~_

"What is it Sakura? I'm very busy" Tsunade said me. Looking at the papers on her desk I knew she was. (Busy)

Oh god all the times I imagined this would be easy...I was so wrong. Well here it goes. "WellyouseeIampregnant...please don't be mad" All the words that came out of my mouth came out wrong...man am I stupid. Tsunade took a look at me like I was crazy. And I wouldn't blame her I sure sounded like it. 'I wonder of she understood what I said?'

"Sakura slow down!" Tsunade said. More like snapped.

Why was I scared...that was easy. She could get mad,tell me I'm to young and get rid of it. I never even wanted anybody to find out about it either. As you can see I can't trust anybody anymore.

"I-I am pregnant" I looked away as I said this. I was so ashamed.

Tsunade for once looked up from her papers and started to move her lips but nothing came out. She was speechless.

"S-Sakura?" She asked with her eyes filled with disappointment. "When did this happen?" She asked quietly.

"About three weeks ago" I whispered with tears in my eyes. Man did I hate when my emotions got the best of me. By the way she didn't say anything back made me upset.

"Are you going to keep it?" Tsunade asked once more.

I was shocked by her words. I haven't been pregnant long but I was sure going to keep my baby. "Yes!" I snapped.

Tsunade sighed before she said. "It's not as easy as you think it would be!" She yelled back.

I knew that when I was found out that I was pregnant. The true was I didn't know how things were going to be after the baby's birth. Soon enough Sasuke was going to find out which made things worst. But that was the future I had to deal with the situation now. "I don't care how hard things get I'm keeping it!" I yelled.

"Have you ever thought about how much this will change your life?" Tsunade said and banged her fist on the table. I could tell that she was really ticked.

"Maybe that's what I need change!" I yelled. It's not like she knows anything about being pregnant. "Everyone needs change at some point in their life!"

Tsunade's face seemed so angry that I couldn't even explain. "Your not old enough to take on this responsibility!"

"Maybe your right but I'll never know til I try" I softly said with tears flowing down my eyes.

Tsunade looked away. "I have one more question..." Tsunade said to me. Still looking away. "Who's the father?"

Man I hate this part right here. "..." I stayed quiet. I really didn't want to answer.

"Well I need a answer" Tsunade said with a bitter tone.

"S-Sasuke" I answered because I didn't want her to ask again.

"Uchiha?" Tsunade asked with a hurt look.

I nodded.

"Get out" Tsunade whispered and pointed to the door.

I walked out without another word. This didn't turn out the way I wanted...but that's just how life is. Things don't always turn out the way you want them to. But there's nothing I can do about it just deal with it like I always have.

"Shizune get me my Sake!" I heard Tsunade yell as I walked to the exit of the tower.

~~~.~~~

Once I was far away from the tower I started to cry silently.

_'Why me?'_I questioned and cried in my hands. I tried my hardest to make it home without anyone seeing me. _Why? _That was the question I wondered. To think that I had a great life without a care in the world. But I'm older and reality was hitting me...and hard. But I just need to stay strong. But there was so much to think about. Who knew A little mistake could make such a big problem. But did I think it was a mistake? The whole thing with Sasuke. Yeah that was a mistake. But the baby I'm carrying in my stomach...not one bit. I'll never thought that and never will. People have problems but mine was different.

I walked down the street and to my apartment. I noticed a little bag at the door of my apartment. _'I wonder...'_ I questioned myself and picked the bag up and looked inside. It came with a little note that I read it said:

_Sakura I know you need time by yourself so I'll let you be.  
__But the day you let the mall you forgot your dress.  
I just wanted to return it._

_love, Ino_

_P.S If you need anything..anything at all I'm here for you. You know my number._

I smiled a bit as I read the note and walked inside my apartment with the bag in hand.

I was feeling hungry so I made me some anko dumpling and ate in the quiet. I sighed after I ate all I wanted was the quietness to go away! I knew that once the baby was born there would be no quietness. It just made me excited just think about have a baby to love. I smiled at the thought and put my dish in the sink. I was to tired to do the dishes so I headed off to bed.

_'No more quietness'_ I thought to myself before I fell into a deep sleep.

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**So how was that? :D I'll try and update faster next time! But all I ask is to Review! *puppy dog face***


	4. Chapter 4

~Sakura's POV~

A week when by. It seemed like forever from all the morning sickness. Of course I was rarely outside. I avoided all of my friends. And before I knew it everyone was getting ready for the Fall Ball. Of course I didn't want to go. Tsunade could have told someone. But not just anybody...Sasuke. All the thoughts in my head made my head hurt as I watched the morning sky through my window. I knew the thoughts were just stress. But every time I thought about the baby my thoughts just flowed away.

I rubbed my stomach gently. "Time for food" wow food never sounded so good in my life. I walked to the kitchen with a smile on my face. I shivered as my bare feet hit the floor. What was I craving today? I closed my eyes and thought. "Ramen" I said with a smile. But of course no one could see me. So I put on a pair of sweats and a jacket with a hood. I put my hair in a messy pony tail then walked out the door. A light wind started to blow as I walked outside. I really didn't like the coldness. I reminded me of my bed...but this wind didn't seem so bad as it hit my face. It was nice to get some air. I put my jacket hood over my head and started to walk to the ramen bar. I abruptly put my hands in my pockets and looked up at the sky.

I watched as the clouds when by. Each different shapes and sizes. _'Maybe I'll go star watching tonight'_I thought with a smile. In a few minutes I was at the ramen bar. I sat down on one of the stools. "One miso ramen please" I said to Teuchi, the owner of the ramen shop.

"Coming right up" He said to me.

"Come on I'm hungry" I heard Naruto yell at someone.

_'Damn'_ I thought and put my head down. Maybe if I just stay quiet they won't notice me.

"Shut up" Sasuke said to Naruto as they both walked up to the ramen bar and sat down.

Could anything get any worse? I just wanted to me away from them! Was that to much to ask for?

"Here you are Miss" Teuchi said and sat my bowl of ramen in front of me. I just wanted to eat then leave as soon as possible.

"A large serving of miso ramen with roasted pork fillet!" Naruto said(more like yelled) to Teuchi with a smile. "Are you getting anything Sasuke?" Naruto asked Sasuke.

"I'm not hungry" Sasuke said with his eyes closed.

"Oh" Naruto said.

"Coming up" Teuchi said and went to the back.

_'I hope they didn't notice me' _I thought and looked at my ramen. _'Don't worry'_my thoughts said. I just needed to relax. I started to eat my ramen without trying to be noticed.

In a few minutes most of my ramen was gone and Teuchi came back with Naruto's ramen. I just continued to eat my ramen quietly.

"Time to eat!" Naruto said, grabbed his chop sticks and started to eat his ramen fast.

That was Naruto for ya. I smiled a bit. I wish i could smile like this more often. I looked down at my bowl to see that I eaten it all. _'Wow. Who knew I could eat that much'_ I got up, put the money on the counter and walked away. I tears sled down my cheek as I walked away.

"Sakura" I heard Sasuke said as he stood behind me.

"Shit" I whispered.

His hands suddenly where around my arms. Then he turned me around. I turned my head away so I didn't have to look at him.

"Look at me" He quietly said.

_'Does he know?' _The thought rushed to my mind as another tear fell down my cheek. "Sasuke I-"

"Look at me" He said again. But I refused.

I-I could look at him. Or even be near him. "I-I-" I was searching for the words in my head. "Sas-" I stopped my sentence as his lips came in contact with mine. And was it heaven! I closed my eyes,wrapped my arms around his neck and his hands on my hips. It was so tender I couldn't explain. Everything went blank in my mind. Why was I doing this? I was in love with him. The one thing I didn't want. I push away and started to breath heavily from the lack of air. And he did the same. "I..." I said and the tears started to flow.

"Sakura" Sasuke said and started to wipe away my tears. I didn't want to love him. Not after everything. I...just couldn't. I just hated him and loved him at the same time.

I slapped his hand away and ran. As fast as my legs could go. I just wanted to be alone!

"Sakura!" I heard Sasuke's voice fade as I continued to run.

I stopped once I got to the meadow. I fell flat on my back and closed my eyes. "Why?" I sobbed. I didn't want to love him nor did I want to hate him. I couldn't control my emotions. They were getting the best of me. The promise. I seemed to blame myself. It was all my fault. I was the one who had to get pregnant! Why me? I opened my eyes and looked at the passing clouds. "Me" I said. I was the cause of my problems. That didn't make sense. I rubbed my stomach. Maybe this wasn't a bad thing. It might even be worth wild some day. I closed my eyes again. Man was I tired. _'Being pregnant has taking alot out of me' _I soon fell asleep.

~~~~Sasuke's POV~~~~

"Sakura?" I yelled as I walked through the village. Running off again. What did I do wrong? Nothing. I started to ran to the meadows. "Sakura?" I said and looked around. Seriously what was up with her. I just needed to know.

I sat down for a moment and looked at the sky. _'What is wrong with her?'_I questioned in my mind. It was probably a girl thing. That I'll never understand. I looked around and spotted something pink. "What's that?" I said and ran to it. "Sakura" I said as a looked at her sleeping body. "Must be tired" I said quietly and picked her up.

She started to cry in her sleep. I hated to see her cry. I didn't know what made her so unhappy. I just wanted to steal her pain away. I started to walk to her house. "Why?" That's what I wanted to know. Why was she so unhappy? Soon enough I was at her door step. I reached in her pocket, grabbed her keys, unlocked the door, and opened it.

I set hair down on her bed. It was like she was a different person. I never saw her as much. She never smiled, laugh or said much. I pushed some of her hair out of her beautiful face.

"Sasuke" She mumbled in her sleep.

"Yeah?" I answered her. i knew she wouldn't answer because she was asleep of course. _'She must be sleep'_ I thought and rubbed her cheek before I left.

~~~Sakura's Dream~~~

_"Sasuke" I said as I kissed him. We were both drunk._

_His cold arms wrapped around my waist and pulled me closer. "Yeah?" He answered with a smile._

_"Are you sure about this?" I asked with a concerned tone. _

_"Of course" He said with a smirk and kissed my neck. "I promise. Nothing will happen" He said._

_My head started spinning as I looked at him. "O-ok" I said with a smile._

~~~~Sakura's POV~~~~

I woke suddenly with tears in my eyes. The dream again. More like a memory replaying in my head. I wanted it to stop. I looked around and noticed I was in my bedroom. "How did I get here?" I asked and felt my cheek. My cheek was oddly warm. "You're going crazy Sakura" I whispered before I closed my eyes again. Hoping for a dreamless sleep.

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**I'm so sorry I didn't update sooner! I had a little writer's block. But I hoped you liked it! I'd like to thank **_kanime32,Kariann-chan,Lady Yume Chan, mistressinwaiting, Nara Sakura-Sama,vampy-chan321, brebabi101_ for faving/alerting/reviewing! **Review! :D**


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